For years, we’ve posted weekly blog posts giving you tips to save water and also live a more sustainable lifestyle in general. Our tips have ranged from the simple to the intense, and we’ve even pitched how to speak to your less conservation-inclined friends about why their consumption matters.
But we get it. Maybe you just can’t be bothered to save water or reduce other unsustainable habits. So this week we’re going to look at your alternatives to sustainable living. Really, you don’t need to consider the impacts of your choices if you do these things.
Option 1: carry a snorkel with you at all times. If you don’t have access to a snorkel, a SCUBA kit or kayak would work as well. When I was young, I heard warning after warning that the sea levels would soon begin to rise, and now it’s happening. It’s gradual now and you’re not likely to get washed away in a tidal wave when you’re just walking down the street, but if you can’t work to avoid sea level rise, you could at least be prepared for the inevitable.
Option 2: go on an inedia diet. As rainfall and hot periods become less predictable, our agriculture will become less reliable, meaning there’s less food to go around. Add to that the fact that short-sighted growing methods mean some familiar foods may go extinct, and you’ll be happy you got a head-start on not eating.
Option 3: become a bubble boy or bubble girl. Climate change can create ideal breeding conditions for mosquitoes and other disease-carrying nuisances. Expect to see more instances of diseases that were once so rare we never needed to consider them, like malaria and cholera.
Option 4: win the lottery. We already touched above on how global warming can cause food shortages, but even when food is available the prices will go way up. You can also expect to pay more for your water, and if you live in the regions hit hardest by climate change you may even have to pick up and move entirely. The best way to prepare is to make sure you’re independently wealthy now.
Option 5: have a well-written will. Because whether it’s attributable to polluted air, more hurricanes and other extreme storms, or even climate-change related car accidents, you’re going to see an upswing in deaths in under twenty years. No matter how many of the preparations we listed you take, you can’t avoid all the impacts of climate change.
So by now, you’ve probably figured out this article is a bit tongue-in-cheek. We don’t recommend you prepare for the worst-case scenario while there’s still a chance to avoid the worst-case entirely. Think green; live green!